Doctor White (El Doctore Bianco)

Cheif Whitewater Testing Bandito

Doctor White, the smooth operator with the amazing ability to surf purely in the frothy stuff, who unfortunately passed on whilst doing just that. He described himself as follow:

"I'm Doctor White. The only truly evil doctor in existence. You thought that Doctor Shipman was evil. He isn't close to the level of pure evil that I am. I am the evillest, evil doctor of all time, no-one is more evil than I, NO-ONE, do you hear? The most evil... and sick as well. Yeah, I'm the sickest most evil, evil doctor in the world ever.

"So, now you're thinking how does this evil Doctor White (El Doctore Bianco) personify his evil status? Well when you attain my level of pure evil, personification is irrelevant. You don't need scary teeth or a stupid laugh, or even a strange distant look in your eyes. Evil is something that you have or you don't, and if the talent is there it takes years of training and nurturing to attain the level of evil at which I currently reside. In fact the whole idea of looking evil whilst being quite evil is extremely outdated in inner evil circles, and is a technique popular with only trainee or dropout Evillists. Charles Manson was a prime example, well thought to be of extreme evil but actually only a trainee, a green belt, I on the other hand am supremely Evil, a ninth D.A.N. (Devilish And Nasty) in evil. My evilness knows no bounds."

His obiturary is as follows:

"Women the world over were mortified today when the news broke of the death of Doctor White.
Although renowned for being the embodiment of pure evil, Dr. White had many loyal fans and followers, probably entranced by some dark form of black magic.
It is not entirely clear how Doctor White met his end but it is likely he was drowned whilst preparing to ride the largest foaming white monster yet attempted. The body of Dr White has yet to be recovered, however eyewitnesses report seeing a man matching the description of Barone Von Evilgoat hauling a body from the sea, close to Dr White's record attempt location. White was famous for his skills at surfing purely on foamy, mushy white water. Outspoken on the matter, White often claimed that "getting out back is gay" preferring a more "manly" beating at the hands of mother ocean on the inside.
Barone von Evilgoat, a reputed associate of White, was "too emotional" to comment on events, releasing this statement: "Dr White wanted me to take his place in the Bandito Organisation, and assume his soul." It was all quiet at Von Evilgoat's mansion yesterday, only the smoke and smell coming from a barbeque providing any evidence of occupation.
A police spokesman today stated: "Obviously we are treating this death as suspicious, everything White ever did was suspicious, however we are not going to investigate further because we really don't give a shit. It's only a shame we didn't get to finish the bastard off ourselves." The mystery of the missing body will probably remain just that for a long time yet."

Dr. White's former pre sesh top 10 - tracks to get you in the mood (no order of pref.)

• Spybreak - Propellerheads
• Blue Lines - Massive Attack
• 3 MCs and one DJ - Beastie Boys
• If They Move, Kill 'em - Primal Scream
• Shack Up - Banbara
• Daybreak - Stone Roses
• Crosstown Traffic - Jimi Hendrix
• You Want it Back - Propellerheads & Jungle Brothers
• Tough at the Top - EZ Rollers
• Rome wasn't built in a day - Morcheeba
• (Bonus Track) Anything by the 80's diva of cheese - Belinda Carlisle

Dr. White's former top 10 post session chill out tracks (in no particular order of preference)

• Whole Lotta Love - Ike and Tina (C. 1974)
• California Soul - Marlena Shaw
• The Beat Goes On - Buddy Rich
• Tomorrow Will Be Like Today - Money Mark
• Why Did You Do It? - Stretch
• Mini Bar Blues - Fun Lovin' Criminals
• Bogeyman - Red Snapper
• Divine Sounds - Rae & Christian
• Miss Thang - Unsung Heroes with Jenifer Stancliffe
• Steal My Kisses - Ben Harper
• (Bonus Track) Let's Stay Together - Al Green

The Doc in action at Putsborough